I wore the Shape-ups to school again today. I was throwing a “Latin Olympics” party for a 6th grade class, so I needed to be able to run around and chase down boys stealing the marshmallow shotputs and pool noodle javelins. So I dressed down (BassPro Sweatshirt – shout out to my Dad!) and black pants and my Shape Ups. More students are starting to notice.

“Are you trying to shape up your butt, Miss Weight?” – 8th grade boy. No joke. Good thing I love him.

“Are you trying to get a sexy rear?” – 6th grade boy, who claims he heard that on a Christmas commercial about the shoes. To which I said “you don’t know what that word means. What made you think it was appropriate to say to your teacher? Don’t ever talk to me again.”

“My grandma wears those. Are you a grandma?” – 6th grade girl.

The women in the office placate me with promises that my butt looks better already. I don’t really care too much about the butt thing and getting fit anymore. They are just so freaking comfortable. I feel like I am walking on clouds. The great thing about my job, too, is that I am surrounded by women and children. There is no chance I will meet my future husband at my job. So I can go to work looking as beat as I want. My students will still think I’m cooler than them. They’re only 12, so they’re not too hard to impress. But especially because they have to wear uniforms everyday, I feel like I could belt a potato sack and wear jeggings and boots and the girls would still love it. So I rock the Shape Ups. But. You can still see my socks when I walk. Sigh. So here I will debate their pros and cons.

cons –

  • i look ridiculous.
  • i walk funny. i went on a walk through my neighborhood at a pretty good clip, but it hurt my knee so i had to adjust and walk a little funny. anyone driving by probably thought i was hurrying home to go poop.
  • they can’t be worn with anything other than workout clothes to avoid weird stares. I am still wearing them, with work pants and cute shirts and cardies…..but….I drew the line at a pencil skirt today.
  • sometimes i almost fall wearing them. i could never break into a jog or run for a more intense workout while wearing the-

hey. that sounds like a pro.

pros –

  • i could never be forced into jogging or running while wearing them. walking only. serious walking, but walking only. Almost a stroll.
  • There might be some potential fitness benefits.
  • They make me taller.


They give me writing material. :)