“I’m pretty sure I touched my first butt to Boyz II Men in the seventh grade.” – Eric
Simply the most iconic Bachelorette quote of ALL time.
We’ve seen a lot in these last few weeks, spoiled by the excess footage ABC is dumping on us. But I like it.
- I’ve decided I really like Andi. She goes on dates that she sucks at. Heights, snow sports, singing. She pulls pranks on the guys. She makes out when she wants to. She swears. She apologizes to her mom. She is beautiful, smart, funny, excited. I mean, stoop. Just stop. :) I feel like she’s one of the few bachelorettes in recent memory that I would actually be friends with.
Male stripping – um. WHY is this even necessary?! Oh, well. It was funny. they get dressed as popular female fantasties…if I were casting this, let’s see…I’d cast firefighters, for sure! Navy. Cowboys. Maybe a Han Solo number. But I’ve seen male strippers and…it just doesn’t do it for me. Except Channing Tatum in all things Magic Mike. Crosseyed and shirtless and wow is it hot in here?
- Fav Quote: “Mom – I swear I’m going to church tomorrow morning.” – proper response after stripping on tv.
- Dylan – your story is tragic beyond words and I want to hold you for a long, long time. But I don’t know if this is a good place for you right now. Or ever. You need to do some healing, my friend. If you want to put your wee head in my lap and let me stroke your luscious hair for a few hours while we talk it out, we can do that.
- Heights and Weird Dates – Again, I really admire Andi for going along with date ideas that she clearly isn’t comfortable with. She’s got some balls. Or boobs. Or whatever is PC at the moment to say that she’s way braver than I am. But I still beg the producers to give us some more “normal” dates. No one has ever offered to take me rappelling off anything. It’s hard enough to get guys to come up with a date night idea on their own, let alone something interesting. Show us some of the “real people” things. Bowling, movies, mini-golf, game nights with friends. Make them watch Andi’s favorite movie together and see how he handles it. The extravagant dates give us all unrealistic expectations. And honestly? I want the candidates to end up together in the end. I don’t watch the show because I want to see a relationship fall apart. I’ve lived that. The survival rate of couples on this show is what, 2-20? So 1 in 10 actually stay with the person they choose, probably because once they start doing “normal” things like realizing I put on workout clothes to drive to the frozen yogurt store and that Netflix is the third wheel in this relationship, the excitement dies down.
On the other hand…the old people dress up date was HILARIOUS. I laughed so hard. They kissed each other’s prosthetic’s on the tire swing, raced electric wheelchairs on the boardwalk, called each other nicknames and exchanged Werther’s before riding the carousel.
- FIRST KISSES – It simply destroys me when guys ask to kiss. “Can we put our mouth pieces together? I would enjoy that thing with our tongues.” I appreciate that Brian was like “I cannot read signals. I cannot.” Which is fine. But honestly, as a woman, I think I’m pretty obvious about when I’m ready to kiss, and you RUIN IT when you say something like,” sooooo…I’ve been thinking about kissing stuff.” That’s something you admit afterwards, after the first make out, cuddling somewhere and finally confessing all that stuff you’d never been brave enough to say because you weren’t sure what their breath tasted like.
At the end, I thought it was a classy move on the part of the normally class-less ABC producers to dedicate some time to remembering Eric. Maybe they thought it was too cheesy, but I would have liked maybe a montage of some of his cool moments and some pics of him. He was a fan favorite right off the bat (something about him bugged me, not sure what) and it’s awful that he passed away. I like to think that at least he was doing something he loved – traveling and living life on the edge. I hope his last days on earth were amazing.