Sunglasses Always Fit

Giiiiiiirl I have created wine popsicles. And the world will never be the same.

You know how you find a recipe on Pinterest, and you’re like, “that sounds amazing, but Martha Stewart I am not.” (something funny I did this week was play “talk like Yoda” with my family. I recommend.).

This is what happened when I found wine popsicles. It sounded too good to be true. So instead of following a recipe and setting myself up for possible failure, I just kind of invented it. That way, it didn’t matter if I succeeded. But it DID. IT SUPER FREAKING DID.

Here is my recipe:

• A cantaloupe. This is your first challenge, because you find them in a pile at the store, and like, how do you know if they’re good or not? NO idea. I knocked it around for a bit and said “yeah, this is the one.” The choice of fruit had to do a lot with the fact that I’m allergic to most things that are fruit. But not melons.
• White wine. I’m really into boxed wine at the moment. It’s super cost efficient, saves my beloved TREEEEES. And it stays fresh for a long time (as if I really know what “leftover wine” is). And because of money poured into this super valuable technology, it’s pretty delish. I rec Target brands.
• Simple syrup. This is what goes in all your fancy drinks at the bar and makes the calories go cray cray. You simmer equal parts sugar and water together.

How you make it:

• 

  Juice/food processor up the fruit and wine. Measurements are irrelevant. Just go for it. Try to make a mess. Drink some wine while doing so.

• Simma dat syrup, then let it cool, then add it in.
• Pour the mix into some molds. Popsicle ones are good, but I also used some silicone baking racks that worked really well, too. In a pinch, pour into ziploc bags. You can put a straw in them, close with a rubber band and have adult slurpees.
• Freeze for an amount of time.
• Consume.
• Enjoy.
• Praise Jesus for summatime.